Thou shalt commit adultery

"Last Post: Dec. 22, 2007"

For the lulz.

I'm just not even going to attempt to synthesize 9 and half months worth of events. Just not worth it. Instead, I will simply relate roughly a weeks worth of it.

Right now I'm weighing office politics against journalistic integrity regarding the Clarion. Four of the top editors (including both Eds-in-Chief) are involved in leadership or student government, and one EIC, Emma Nathan, has gotten entered into an argument on Facebook about the efficiency, democracy and effectiveness about student government. Specifically, she stated, "Cleveland Clarion Editor in Chief says the newspaper is not to be brought into the argument. We work closely with leadership and have reporters following Kelsey and Paige [student body co-presidents, who were unelected due to lack of opposition] to get stories from them week by week." Does it not occur to her that possibly we shouldn't be "working closely" but rather investigating independently? That perhaps her and several others' connections to leadership and student government represent a conflict of interest that on any higher level would invite justified hostile scrutiny?

I know I have every right to bring this up at an editors' meeting, but my ass is grass for the rest of the year if I do. Either all the other editors either are on leadership, student government, or don't care (with the possible exception of Helen Rappe), and unless I knew that my speaking up would effect actual change in the way Newspaper and Stu-Gov interacted, it's pretty much not worth it to be ostracized by the rest of the senior staff for the next eight months.

So, yeah, I've basically decided not to say anything for now. Fucking office politics are a pain in my ass, and probably will be for the rest of my life.

On a happier note, I all but received confirmation from my boss that my position is being phased out for the autumn, winter, and spring months, which actually is happy, because I wanted my fucking weekends back. I loved working for them and all, but Christ it's nice to sleep in and have time for homework.  Unfortunately, I now have to learn how to save my money. Fuck.

But you know what? I think I might get A's in all my classes this year. It just might fucking happen. And then I'll be able to go to Evergreen right off the bat, which will be nice.

Modest updates.

1) Winter break. Winter... break. Winter break. Winter break. Winter fucking break. Yeah. Life, she is good.

2) "Huckleberry" has finally been rejected as a (male) middle name for my impending sibling. "Benjamin" is in. "Olivine" is also out for first name for a girl. They are leaning on Penelope, but only if they won't call her Penny, which Ursula finds abhorrent. So the front-runners are as follows:

Cyrus Benjamin Wolfe-Rocca
Penelope Clothilde Wolfe-Rocca

3) I had a dream last night in which I directed Mr. Gordin as the lead in a romantic comedy where he plays a Wal-Mart greeter who falls in love with a public relations woman. The night before I dreamt my grandfather was Robert DeNiro, and he liked to play John Denver songs.

I don't need drugs, apparently.

4) It's official. Grades-wise, I am Simon now. I expected a more gradual transition, but it took all of three months of IB classes to effect thechange.

5) I've been reading Derrick Jensen. So now I've gone from pretty fucking left wing to anarcho-primitivist. Maybe I haven't thought his stuff through enough, but having read his book and seen him speak, I think he's the real thing. As much I try to rationalize or prove him wrong, there is not a single thing he has said that I can reject on principle.

6) FUCK. WHY IS CHRISTMAS ON TUESDAY? I NEED SHOPPING TIME. GAH. MAJOR GAH.

With epic love,
*ñ3

So, the. . . what, five of you who get updates for my journal? I'm not hiding anymore. It wasn't an LJ-exclusive thing, I found 93 emails after finally logging into Gmail after about 2 weeks. I've yet to open Facebook, but I shall.

I've been depressed and detached for a few weeks, because I squandered the break I got from starting a new quarter, and now I'm even more behind than I was. My brain just doesn't. . . work with school. Shit, even my shrink said she didn't have any remedies for my behavior on hand. She said it defied the term 'slacker', though, which made me feel better and more afraid at the same time. The fact that I'm not just a slacker doesn't change the fact that I'm getting a D in Phys 1 and PreCal. And it also means I can't just "shape up" or some such bullshit.

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaanyway.

I'm hoping that maybe if I just cut my losses after 10 o'clock and go to bed instead of dropping further into my addiction to StumbleUpon, then maybe I won't feel so lethargic in the evenings. Which may help.

Alas, the holiday season is here, and I cannot help but feel a little bit better.

I just now remembered that I forgot to register for the IB test in Anthropology. Great. Now I won't have a test grade to show for what is probably my favorite IB class. 

I'm wondering exactly what roadblock is preventing me from kicking my own ass into gear and finishing those goddamned physics questions. Possibly it's the fact that I'm on LiveJournal posting about why I'm not kicking my own ass into gear and finishing those goddamned physics questions. It's a thought, though at my current pace, it will only be considered when the pressure to do them has me on the verge of tears.

Must be a normal weekend.

I'm also mad at myself for not taking advantage of the blind-and-deafen-yourself-for-two-hours assignment from Theory of Knowledge before the penultimate day. So, I get to write 500-750 words about how I walked around the house with just a blindfold on. Oh, yeah, people will just be dazzled by my depth. Though I suppose that's not the point, I still couldn't think of a single thoughtful thing to say when I tried to write the paper. So I'm leaving it until 3rd period tomorrow, and I'll make some shit up, and in all probability it will be just as meaningful as if I sat down and banged my head against the keyboard for three hours actually trying to think about it.

I'm waiting for the day when a postcard comes to the house saying "Congratulations! You're no longer a self-destructively procrastinating jackass!" Until then, it seems as though this will be the norm until I start working for myself and not the system.